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Sanjay and Craig Review/Transcript
(Shows clip from Mr. Enter's Fleabag Monkeyface Review) Announcer: 'Some viewers may find this disturbing. '''Past Enter: '''If I could give you guys...'one solitary 'warning...it would be to turn off the video right now. ''(Intro consisting of clips from Sanjay and Craig) 'Craig: '*vomits up rats* Everyone barfs, including you, Hector Flanagan! '''Sanjay: '''This'll totally make him barf! '''Narrator: '''The giraffe birth is one of nature's most unique and breathtaking scenes...*the giraffe makes sounds of pain '''Sanjay: '''Never barfing? That-that's like saying there's no sky! That's like saying our belief in barf is a lie! I'm just gonna say it! This show is awful! I'm not even gonna be nice about it. This show makes my skin crawl. Y-you know how I keep saying "it's not the worst ever"? That's because it's supposed to build to the impact when we get to the worst ever. And '''this show is the worst of the lot! It-it has to be the worst of the lot. I pray to any god there is, that there is no Nicktoon worse than this one. Sanjay and Craig ''is...I don't even know how to describe how bad this one is. Back when I started reviewing, for 2013 and 2014, I had a lot of weaknesses as a reviewer. One of them was being overly hostile and mean, and there are a lot of shows that I was extremely hostile towards that didn't really deserve it. It's come to my conclusion though, that there are a 'couple 'of shows that I had the actual problem where I was much too nice! The first one was ''Powerpuff Girls 2016. I was optimistic that that show was just finding its bearings and would get better as time went on. It got worse, and it degraded into a repulsive show with terrible writing, destroying the franchise, and filled with, let's just call them creepy undertones. Allegro: 'It's...party time! ''(Allegro, Blossom and Bubbles start twerking) 'Buttercup: '''Ugh, gross. '''Princess Bluebell: '''My prince? *kisses Buttercup on the lips* *gasps* You're not a prince! '''Bliss: '*screams* 'Powerpuff Girls: '*scream* 'Bliss: '*screams* 'Powerpuff Girls: '*scream* 'Bliss: '*long scream* 'Powerpuff Girls: '*long scream* The other show I was too nice on was Sanjay and Craig ''apparently! '''Sanjay: '''Oh no, I got it all over the carpet! '''Hank: '''Don't worry about that players, I got yer back! Oh yeah, it's really in there. *eats the sandwich off the floor* '''Sanjay: '''But I stepped in dog poo- '''Hank: '''Problem solved! Back in the day, I did say that ''Breadwinners ''was worse, but that's because I wasn't all that thorough. Back then, when I did talk about a show, I didn't look very far into it. Sometimes, I only watched a couple of episodes or in the worst case scenario, only one episode. I mean it should have been pretty obvious that I wasn't the most "up and up" on this show back then, considering I got the names of Sanjay and Craig backwards. Full disclaimer: I may get their names backwards in this video too. But I don't give a shit, cause this show doesn't deserve any of my shit. It has enough shits of its own! The episode that I did take a look at back then was "Fart Baby," and that episode definitely wasn't as bad as ''Breadwinners' ''"Love Loaf," or, any of the other Breadwinners ''episodes that I watched, and yes I did watch several, even back then. However the episode "Unbarfable" which I didn't watch back then, is just about the ''worst thing ''that I've ''ever seen''. No I am not exaggerating. I would not be surprised if I found that episode on Ren & Stimpy's Adult Party Cartoon. I was not able to sit through that eleven-minute cartoon episode in one sitting. This is something I cannot say about even the worst episodes of ''any other Nicktoon so far''. Pound for pound, Sanjay and Craig ''is the worst. It-it just has to be. I '''refuse '''to accept a reality where there is anything worse on Nickelodeon. But maybe we're getting ahead of ourselves. This show stars a boy named Sanjay and his pet snake named Craig. And there is nothing more to this concept because this is an "'and" show, which is becoming one of my least favorite genres of cartoons. You've seen this genre and you've hated it, even if you don't know what it is. Pickle '''and '''Peanut ''is about two characters named Pickle and Peanut causing hell for everyone around them. ''Fanboy '''and '''Chum Chum ''is the same concept with interchangeable characters. ''Robot '''and '''Monster. Same concept, interchangeable characters. True, not every cartoon that uses this titling convention is bad. There's Phineas and Ferb, Tuca & Bertie, Rick and Morty, Tom and Jerry, maybe Cow and Chicken? But the titling convention itself is bad. Can we just talk about this? If I asked you out of context, you've never seen the show, who is Sanjay? What would you say? You'd say nothing because you know literally nothing about Sanjay! If you do know Sanjay, I feel very, very sorry for you. Even if your show is good, when you use this titling convention it tells you nothing about the show. Who the hell is Phineas and why the hell should I care? Oh yeah, this show stars Tom! You know, Tom! The one and only Tom in all of television, all of media, you've never seen Tom before! Title should tell me exactly what the show is about, I should not be able to mistake it for any other. I will give Breadwinners ''a bit of credit here, since they actually put some effort and, a clever pun into their title. Even though it is an "and" show in all but name but, if ''Breadwinners ''is putting more effort into something than you, you have a problem. Not helping is that pretty much the stars of every "and" show are interchangeable. Fanboy and Chum Chum are a bit more annoying than Sanjay and Craig, but Sanjay and Craig are '''much '''more disgusting. By the way, when I say "gross," I mean '''really '''gross. This show is foul and '''disgusting'. This is the show that Ren & Stimpy ''gets stereotyped as; '''full '''wall-to-wall grossout, '''every '''single episode has barf or snot or gross-up closeups. Do not watch this show while eating. You will not barf as many times as the characters onscreen, but I guarantee that you'll probably barf! Yeah, ''Mega Babies ''is probably more gross in the grand scheme of things, but that's not saying much. These shows died out 'decades 'ago and for a very good reason! No one wants to watch a character eating a stepped-on sandwich on the floor, Sanjay mentioning that he ''stepped ''in dog shit before he stepped on the sandwich, and then the character finishing said sandwich! Followed up by another character slobbering with a dog who has a face that looks like an ass! They don't use words like "shit" or "ass" in the show, but they might as well! It's not cute, it-it is plain wrong! And yes, I did see more episodes than "Unbarfable." Every time I complain about ''Sanjay and Craig, people defend the show with "The Giving G," saying it's heartwarming or something and it redeems the show. I'm sorry, but I don't see characters befriending an inanimate giant inflatable gorilla heartwarming! At best, you can call it a farce, I call it overly melodramatic! It feels very much like "Son of Stimpy," where John K. decided to make a plot deliberately ''to pull heartstrings to play a joke on the audience making them feel sad that Stimpy couldn't fart. And yes, if that episode made you sad, that was actually the intention. It was there to make fun of sad cartoon episodes. Because John K. wants to kill the concept of storytelling. Let's talk about the art style of ''Sanjay and Craig. It's done by the same artist as Bob's Burgers, and that's all you're going to hear about it because that's all there is to about it. By same artist, I mean he's basically copy-pasting the same characters. I find this a problem. I think that it's ''way ''too similar to Bob's Burgers. I-I do know that every artist has a style that's kinda like handwriting something that's hard to break away from, but Bob's Burgers ''has a very unique, or, ''formerly ''unique art style. And it's just ''too ''unique to be cribbed by another show like this. If another show wanted to a parody of ''Bob's Burgers, this is the art style that they would use. Most of the Klasky Csupo shows looked very similar back in the day, but they did look unique. Even though they were on the same network. While you could tell that Klasky Csupo made Stressed Eric ''and ''Duckman ''if you looked at them, it'd be hard to mistake a screenshot from ''Rugrats ''with ''As Told by Ginger. And Klasky Csupo was able to go beyond ''their own style. They did animate ''The Simpsons early on. Almost any still from this show you can confuse with a still from Bob's Burgers, plastered with puke and shit. This is a problem because it harms any chance that this show could have for an identity, and yeah, it really ''doesn't have any of that. The concept of the show cribs on the trends of the time. These characters have nothing going for them. Craig is a snake and they do some interesting things with that, I guess. He's able to become a knot, and tie things up, and uh...wear clothes, and...turn himself inside out. Gross. But in terms of personality, tell me the difference between these two. I mean, Craig is ''obviously the "Buhdeuce." The "Fanboy." And Sanjay is the "Chum Chum" of the show, the "SwaySway." Sanjay is the "Cow" to Craig's "Chicken"! I've seen it and I do not like it! Although I guess someone out there has to since this shit lasted for three seasons. I know what you're thinking: "This show is for the kids! It's okay if kids like it!" Dexter's Laboratory ''was made for the kids, as was ''Courage, as was The Powerpuff Girls. The original Ren & Stimpy ''was, they still hold up. Even on Nickelodeon we have ''The Loud House ''which was made for the kids and it's fine. People remember and care for these shows today and still ''watch them today. When it comes to something like Sanjay and Craig, their audience is gonna grow out of them and move on to something else, leaving this in the dust forever. Don't believe me on that? Even something as monumental as Teen Titans Go! ''is now waning in popularity, leaving Cartoon Network in a very precarious position. None of ''their new episodes crack a million views, and some of them don't even crack half a million. Hell, some of them don't even crack quarter ''of a million. This is what happens when you do nothing but try and cash in on modern day trends. Years later, do you care about ''Sanjay and Craig? I am seriously curious. People who defended this show, God, five ''years ago, I'm getting old. Do you still stick by it? I'm sure that some people do. But is anyone gonna say that "''Sanjay and Craig ''was my life"? I highly doubt it, it was just a show that they watched back in the day that they might have liked. All we're left with is some blip that's gonna be considered an embarrassment in a few years. I know that I didn't get too deep into the nuts and bolts of this one, but that's because there's not much to it. I can't say much that I haven't said about ''Breadwinners ''in the past, or ''Fanboy and Chum Chum, or the million other grossout shows that I've reviewed. There's a reason that I do try to avoid reviewing grossout shows and grossout episodes nowadays. Cause there usually is no substance to them. And there is none here. Well, "no substance" might be the wrong word, it's filled ''with substances! Like fart gas, dog shit, old people wrinkles, snot, barf, and some things that are probably better left unmentioned. I've discovered quite a few shows that I don't like in this retrospective, and I think that things like ''All Grown Up! or The Mighty B! ''would probably make at least a ''fine review someday. We can all have fun, you know, mocking it, making fun of it. Even if I didn't like the show itself...I'm at least willing to watch them again. As for this show, no. I am never ''watching ''Sanjay and Craig ''again. And this is someone who considered watching more episodes of ''Allen Gregory, I marathoned the entire ''series of ''High School USA, I watched more than one episode of Big Mouth, and I even considered watching more episodes of Adult Party Cartoon. I am never watching another episode of Sanjay and Craig ''again. '''Announcer: '''Next on Nickelodeon... ''(Shows clips of Breadwinners theme song) (End Credits Theme: "Sloprano" from Conker's Bad Fur Day) Category:Nick-o-Rama Category:Transcripts